First of all, my brother wrote this on his Facebook and it was so well said I had to share:
My sister lost her brother-in-law earlier this week, and I was again reminded of the fleeting nature of our time here.
Due to previous experiences, one would think I’d have a grasp of just what to say in such situations, but I really don’t; words seem to fall woefully short. Time and attention, though… those are the things you are most grateful for once the haze of grieving fades.
So, consider this a brief note for future reference when you eventually confront situations like this–words mean little simply due to the enormity and shock of death. People remember those who were there, though… those who came to a home or a funeral… nothing fancy… no profound messages or statements needed. Rather, any simple sign of support and affection. Just be there… that’s it…. that’s what people need… that’s what you find yourself truly appreciating.
Having said said that, I’ve found my “niche” in how to be helpful during this time. Provide lots of hugs and lots of food…that has been my job and believe it has blessed the family. Several people weren’t eating at all (totally understandable) but my constant food nagging got them eating again 🙂 That has blessed me beyond measure.
I saw Matthew tonight. I’ve seen my own brother in a coffin, I’ve seen my Dad in a coffin but it wasn’t until tonight that I could actually look at Matthew for awhile and realize how the body is just a vessel. Matt’s spirit has gone on and is HAPPY and pain free for once in his life. Praise God for that. I saw something the night Matt passed…I will never get into that for fear of sounding insane…but I know Matt is so happy now. And seeing him empty tonight just assured me of all that is to come for us at the end of this life.
Love and live life deeply for it is fleeting. That is what I’m learning this week. Grandad has decided to move to Cali with my in laws which has me OVER THE MOON!!! I love Grandad as my own so I’m so happy! Pray Jana & James find a house for them in Cali and that everything here goes smoothly. Of course the funeral is tomorrow so keep praying for the family